17th January 2014

a new year, new starting of my life...
how i m moving on, how i m leaving to search for my prince...
yup...i get it liao...
today is the 7th day...
all this while we are sweet...(re lian qi??)
but today we keep argue, keep fighting...
where i m not feeling well...
i told him everything without secret and i also tell him y i m not feeling well...
he is understanding, supporting, loving, respecting everything i done, decision i make...
maybe readers may feel everything will be ok when in "re lian qi"...
i m also waiting how long he will stay with me...
he say i like to talk bout some sort like break up stuff...
i wish told him, i m saying this so that i wont totally happy and prepare a heart if he leave me 1day....
he also asked what he should do, to prove he wont leave me?and will love me until i ask him to leave?
just maintain like this ba...being cute, understanding, supporting and loving me always...
i cant feel the safeness is my own confident which is low on love...
my past relationship does not bring a good result for me...
all this while i just know how to an lian ppl but dunno how to dating...
i feel i will makes my lover tired easily...
and if u tired, i will feel the pain also...
so i wish to see u get ur happiness even without me...
this is me...all this while...
but i realize, if i keep thinking he will get happiness when leave me will make him more sad and tired ba...
so, i promise to try my best not to mention liao...
i will try my best to be confident which i also can give him happiness...
i told him before: when i confirm my feeling ed, den i will never leave u until u told me u love someone else, no feeling or god arrangement...
we r not in stable relation yet...
2more obstacles we need to go through...
one of it is my studies...(if i can concentrate den we goes on, if cant den we break up-he is respecting and understand me, he also worried bout my education...hehe)
after i can went through these obstacles den we will officially together liao...
thanks for loving me...
thanks for giving me happiness...
thanks for understanding me...
thanks for respecting me...
thanks for supporting me...
i try my best to go through the obstacles so that we can create more memories when study time o~
hehe^^

unsafe feeling~

have a nice holiday with junior and senior...

where it also develop a strong friendship between us...

strong connection between us...

is a sweet and good memory...

but i feel myself will going to the dangerous zone...

my junior treat me very nice...

nice until sometimes i feel we are not just a friend...

maybe outsider will feel we are couple ba...

lean on shoulder, massage each other, persuade each other if 1 of us get angry...

very care each other not only health but feeling...

dislike his temper...cause his temper not good at all (same like me)...

but he change a lot because of me or not i not sure...

a lot a lot of things that we understand each other...

main point: am i fall to 1 sided love again?

i m tired....heart feel sour...heart wan to avoid the impossible things...

tears fall down whenever think it will break the friendship...

aquarius ppl always makes ppl who she or he love tired...

this is also 1 reason i dun wan start a new relationship...

i need concentration to move on my life...

need to settle up this messy feeling by this sem break...